The Book of Death

One’s inscription in the Book of Life on Yom Kippur in reality is a cheat.

The odds of death directly touching someone’s life in any given year is really not that great. After all, one’s demise is truly a once in a lifetime event. This year, however, personally there is no cheat. Rather, it is quite the opposite.

My father’s passing within the year was just the beginning as to what would unravel during the year. The mindful journey led me to ponder whether there is a Book of Death.

The Beginning

While his life defied both actuarial tables and three bouts of cancer, my father now exists only in memories. These memories, however, are complicated by his bifurcated life. A large portion was exuberance and energy while the other was racked by emotional frustration from succumbing to Alzheimer’s.

Not too long after dealing with his passing, I figuratively looked bookshelf to find the Book of Death. This occurred when I received medical test results.

The results were literally “off the chart.” The number was actually so high that it did not fit on the accompanying table! The one test was followed up with another test and then another test. Eventually, there was the biopsy.

The testing yielded a most concerning diagnosis. Prior to the biopsy, the multiple bad tests resigned me to a likelihood of an accelerated demise. This was my luck; my fate. The Book of Death?

For approximately three months, the prospects of not “being” was both my reality and mindset. While the biopsy eventually came back negative, the psychic wound from the prolonged mental prepping created a permanent psychic scar.

I have accepted that my life moving forward would never be the same. My future is one of perpetual monitoring, testing, and waiting for results.

This is the End?

Is the Book of Death real? Are there an inscriptions just like the Book of Life?

For those who are inclined to believe in the Book of Death, there can certainly be preparation involved. Personally, I took to music to get myself in the right state of mind. Finding Warren Zevon’s two masterpieces helped. His “Keep Me In Your Heart” and his “My “Sh!ts F’ed Up” are the comfort songs for those dealing with the uncomfortable reality of death.

Videos of his songs have comment sections. They are packed with people finding great comfort in these songs as they relate to the most difficult of circumstances. These songs the modern day companions to Psalm 23. They are the tunes perhaps sung when you walking into the valley of the shadow of death towards green pastures.

Becoming Human

During my duress, there was more disturbing news. My father-in-law received a fatal prognosis. For perhaps the first time in my life, I profoundly understood someone else’s dire state of mind.

What does someone say to someone facing a death sentence?

For once in my life, I actually knew the answer. When I saw him, I told him I was proud of him and admired him for what he was doing. It was an expression as to the fact that he was going to live out the rest of his life. While others were present, he was the only one who likely understood.

My comments were far beyond the performative “I’m sorry to hear…” that people all too often employ to those suffering. While discussing pain and suffering with others is not uncommon, my moment with my father in law was different. There was a sharing of something that existing in the deep recesses of despair.

“Who Will be Written in the Book of Life?“

This is likely will be a question heard as part of the Yom Kippur services. This will be the first year that I am an insider to the question. I will be the cheat. I know.

The Bottom Line?

Humans are quite challenged to comprehend the human condition. Initially, this is due to the fact that it is human nature to avoid being hurt. Because humans avoid pain, they lack of the experience and exploration to develop a heightened level of empathy. Humans often lack the capacity to appreciate other’s difficulties. With this, Humans have problems with authentic compassion. I see this all the time in the happiest of moments. Congratulatory speeches are often emotionless. Even worse, chatgpt is used to generate them.

The Day of Atonement

On the Yom Kippur day, the words of Isaiah, Chapter 58, are read. In a day of self reflection, the congregation is told of something that can be as troubling as death itself. They are told to feel uncomfortable by reaching out to others.

“[T]his is the fast I desire: To unlock the fetters of wickedness, And untie the cords of the yoke, To let the oppressed go free; To break off every yoke. It is to share your bread with the hungry, And to take the wretched poor into your home; When you see the naked, to clothe him, And not to ignore your own kin.” Isaiah 58

Those listening to these words are pushed to break out of their element. The words are as piercing as the blast of from the shofar; to awaken oneself from an emotional slumber.

To supplement Isaiah, Yom Kippur offers up the reading of the woeful Prophet Jonah. He is an individual plagued with self-absorption. Jonah is divorced from humanity. He is reduced to finding happiness with a plant that give him shade.

He is rebuked

“But the Lord said, “You have been concerned about this plant, though you did not tend it or make it grow. It sprang up overnight and died overnight. ¹¹ And should I not have concern for the great city of Nineveh, in which there are more than a hundred and twenty thousand people who cannot tell their right hand from their left—and also many animals?” Jonah 4:10.

This passage reveals that the Deity’s superiority to appreciate and understand the human condition. In contrast, a highly regarded human, a Prophet, proves to be in deficit.

Conclusion

While Yom Kippur captures the imagination as to the Book of Life, its serves as a memorial for those who passed.

A human’s greatest challenge towards atonement is perhaps to gain understanding of the human condition. Despite the concept of the Book of Life being a cheat of sorts, it is the message that humans need to hear to inspire themselves to get through another year. On top of it, however, is the holiday’s other message. Humanity perpetually needs to improve on its understanding of the human condition.

Be well!!

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